So if your brain hurts like it's being squeezed in a vice, try these magic hangover cures which are sure to be a soothing balm to that poor head.
They may or may not work.
Run, right now, and hunt down your nearest bain-marie. Ask the person behind the counter to fill up that paper bag with as many piping hot dim sims, chips and chicken strips as they can muster. And don't forget bacon, mmmm bacon, as in this tasty BLT with egg roll recipe.
After a night of partying, your body is probably screaming out for lots and lots and lots of water. Booze is pretty much the king of dehydration, so the sooner you get some H20 the better.
Vending machines are your friends on days like this. Find your closest one, throw in a couple of bucks and seek your deliverance through a sugary can of delicious cola. The best bit is you don't have to talk to someone.
For those who like to put off things rather than confront them head on. Take two parts vodka, add four parts tomato juice, a swig of Worcestershire sauce and a dash of hot sauce. Throw in a stick of celery. Down the hatch.
Athletic people get hangovers too and they don't drink regular liquids like the rest of us. Servos stock sports drinks ending in the word "ade". Apparently, such drinks are rich in electrolytes, whatever they are.
As the jingle goes: Berocca gives you back your b-b-bounce (after too much b-b-booze). Who knows what's in those tablets that makes water go all orange and fizzy, but gee that ad was catchy.
Some people swear by this one. Wash away your sins with a bracing dip in an ice-cold swimming pool or ocean. A bathtub will do in a pinch. You'll be cleansed and ready to go for 2018.
The cure for everything, pain relief meds can sometimes help a hangover too. Pop a couple in your mouth and wash down with a glass of water.
Your eyes feel like dried-out sultanas? It's probably the dehydration thing again. Chemists will sell you some eye drops, which will clear up those bloodshot eyes in no time.
Sweet, sweet caffeine. Some fools might have made their New Year's resolution to give up coffee. Stuff that. This is the time to turn singles into doubles and let the black jolt cure all your troubles.
If you can gather the strength to make it to the gym, a nice solid session could help sweat out all the bad stuff. Just don't push it too hard and drink heaps of water.
Hair of the dog
If the bloody mary wasn't enough to do the trick, maybe it's time to start all over again. Responsibly, of course. Or maybe don't drink next time, it's a good way to feel high and mighty over your fellow man.